Self Absorbed

Well, my blog has taken a hit lately.  Maybe it's because people don't wanna read about me anymore..and that's cool. Or maybe people are jumping on the next ship or blog..or maybe it's because of my absense for the weeks or so while I was recovering from assorted mishaps...

I would like to let all those that used to read this blog know that I'm back..and posting regularly.  If you could help me out, please vote for me here.  It's Best Male Blogs and lots of my readers probably are on there..

Anyway..gimme a 5 as far as a vote..that will push my blog up in the ratings, and I've been assured tby the BMB blogmaster, that will get my blog in the top 10 listing, and more visiable area on the blog.

There was a time that I was listed as #1...and while I'd love that again..I've got to be realistic.

VOTE!

Giving Thanks

Better late than never, I suppose.

Just want to thank my readers. You guys have been very supportive in this time of angst for me and my family and I appreciate it.  I've received many nice comments and a few personal emails. Although I haven't been able to respond to each and every one of you, I am grateful for your support.

This Thanksgiving was particularly fun. I had been looking forward to enjoying the time with my family and friends. We have a huge gathering and everyone exchanged stories about the hurricane and how it affected them. I did my share of wine drinking - but..it's all good! and getting better every day!

Hump Day

Tittie Tuesday: A Dream

I must be dreaming.....

I woke up this morning, very unwillingly. Have you ever woken up, remembering what you were just dreaming, and you were just dying to go back to sleep to continue that dream? Well, that was me today. I didn't really feel all the way awake, so it was easy to slip back into the dream.

 

I was thinking about my online lover last night, and thus, I was inspired by him during my sleep. In my dream, I was in that state between asleep and awake, and I could feel the weight of a very warm body on top of me. I could feel a hard cock pulsating inside me. I love that feeling. My body was responding to that natural rhythm that lovers share. It's such a turn on to be fucked awake, right? My lover was making my dreams come true, coaxing my body to respond to him. He came somewhat quickly, and he continued to pulse inside of me. I kept thinking in my head, don't pull out.......

 

Then, a little while later, I felt warm, wet pulsing again, only this time, it was his tongue, thrusting into me. Mmmmmm, that feels really good. He was holding my hands in his, and making love to my pussy with his hot wet mouth. I was in heaven. Don't stop......

I realized I could hear soft jazz coming from the other room, and it sounded beautiful and relaxing. I was cocooned in my down comforters, and I was so comfortable and cozy. I imagined my lover and I in a very shallow pool just a few inches of water, somewhere tropical. The trees blocked out most of the sunlight overhead, and you could hear water trickling into the pool. I was laying between his legs, I could feel his cock pressed against my stomach, my cheek resting on his stomach. I started to kiss my way up his body, shimmying myself up as I went. He was totally hard, and I guided him into me, sitting up and lowering myself onto him. Ahhhhh, I love that feeling.

 

His hands are on my chest, and I'm establishing that age-old rhythm. He pumps faster and faster, until we both explode, and we both lay back in the shallow pool, laughing, touching, kissing each other.

 

I'm smiling. My eyes are closed. I don't want to leave this place. Just let me sleep.

Unreal

Of course.

He makes plans..he says he's going to cook me dinner. He says he's looking forward to it.

"Great" I say. "Number, address?"
"One sec" he says..
then he disappears.

I chat him saying "Is this where you disappear, never come back, and it reaffirms my belief that I have no chance of finding someone normal and regular?" I say with a little but of humor..hoping that this guy comes back and makes me an "honest man".

No return..days later..I see him online, but he doesn't respond.
I send him a message and finally:

"You didn't give me a chance to explain" he says.
"Well, I thought you'd come back..maybe a day later send me a message.maybe after I contacted you again you'd respond..but..it's 5 days. Now you want to explain?"

Then..the disappearing act again.
Losers.

The New Normal

This is the plan:

You know, I don't think I missed one day of posting on my blog..never, ever..over the past few years of being here, allowing you guys to read my thoughts..I haven't missed a beat.

And now things are different, at least for me. I missed a whole lot of time. What have I been doing? Lots of stuff..catching up on work..a place I also alienated for over 2 weeks.  The work has piled up and, despite some concerns for my well-being from others, most people are all about them - they want the stuff they hired me for and they don't want to be delayed by some silly little storm.

One person I was speaking with after the storm mentioned how it was so hard on him and his family..

"Oh yea?" I asked.  "Were you without electric too?"
"No." he said.
"Oh, no hot water?" I inquired.
"No..we had hot water too."
"Wow..so, the gas lines were tough where you were?" I asked again.
"Nah, they were fine. But, we didn't have Internet for a day!" he said seriously.

Damn..makes you wonder how people can be so trivial.

I plan on being back here, and back on here on a regular basis. I will try, among the work issues, and now, rebuilding things at home that will occupy my time. But, hopefully, I can find some time for you (and me by writing and getting these thoughts out of my head) on this blog.  It does take some time.

I know I've probably lost a lot of readers and maybe they'll return. But, maybe they won't - and that's OK too.  I may take some days here and there..days that I just won't be able to write for the blog. Tittie Tuesday will be back too..she's been giving me some great posts and I need to get those up and running.

Anyway, I do have posts that were written before my life became (even more) complicated.

So, maybe things will soon get back to normal...or maybe not.

Happy Thanksgiving

Today, it's tradition that we spend the afternoon (before gorging ourselves with food at our own celebration) to volunteer at an area shelter to feed the homeless.

We all have a lot to be thankful for. On this day, keep in mind there are always those that are less fortunate than us.

Believe me, I know...so enjoy!

Hump Day

Tittie Tuesday: Mouse at Play

Ok, so I'm very excited! I met a boy...... yes, I met a boy! Let me give you the deets.

So, all this past week, hubby was away on a boy's trip. Fine. So, I decided to go see my parents, so I drove over there. Mind you, when I say I drove over, it's in another state. I love my parents, but they are getting up in years, and the older she gets, the crazier my mom gets. The biggest problem is that her hearing is starting to go, so she doesn't talk, she yells. And she has no filter. Whatever pops into her head, comes right out of her mouth. So, she's an endless stream of trivia and gossip, stuff I don't care about, in level 10 volume. It's the worst when you're watching TV, and suddenly she needs to tell you about the neighbor's mother who had cancer and died. But, sorry, I really digressed there, didn't I? Back to this boy.......

 

So I am at the mall, and I'm in a sports shop where you can buy professional team gear, and I was in need of some new Giant's gear cuz, yea, I'm a huge Giant's fan.

The store is pretty crowded, understandably, since the Giants are bad asses, and they are kicking major ass. It's kind of a small store, and there are about 50 customers in it. I've got my stuff, and I'm in the very long line when I see this very tall guy. Now, I am attracted to tall guys. I think tall boys are very sexy. So, I'm scoping out this guy, and he works in the store. He's flitting around, helping people, and he passes by me and flashes me the most gorgeous smile I'd seen in a long time. I smile back, naturally.

 

He walks by me again, and asks me if I found everything I wanted. "I don't suppose you have any Posey jerseys left, do you?" He smiles at me and says no, they are all out of Posey, but can he find me anything else? So, we start chatting about the Giants, and we get onto pitchers, and then I ask him what he did to his arm. His arm was in a sling, I may have forgotten to mention that! He says he just had shoulder surgery, and he proceeds to take off his cast, and show me the scars. He has a scar on his elbow, too, and I said, "Tommy John?", and he says, "Yes! I had Tommy John last year!" Then he tells me how he also broke his pelvis last year, and I couldn't resist. "Can I see those scars, too?" And he just laughs this incredible boyish laugh that just made my heart smile. He has these huge clear blue eyes. He has dark hair, in a crew cut, and he's 6'4". Yum, yum. He had to go help some customer, and then it was my turn to pay. When I was done at the counter, I looked for him as I walked through the store, but he must have been in the stock room. Oh, well. I didn't want to be a stalker, and hang around, so I left. But before I drove back home today, I decided that I needed a new baseball hat. So, I went back to the mall, and he was there in the store again. I went in, and went right over to the hats.

"That would look cute on you." I turn around, and there he is, in all his tall, blue-eyed glory! "Well then, I'll get this one", I say and hand it to him. The store was very busy again, I mean the Giants winning the World Series and all, so he said he'd take it to the register, and he went off to help someone else. As I was leaving, he was standing by the door. "I like the hat. Thanks." "My pleasure. I'm Daniel." He sticks out his hand. I don't shake it, but I hold his hand in mine, and tell him my name. He smiles again. I tell him it was nice to meet him. "You too. Come see me again, ok?" "I will!", I say.

 

So, I guess I will be going back to visit the parents very soon!

Here I am

It's been a rough few weeks. I don't want to get into too much detail to keep my identity safe so some details will be intentionally sketchy.

Prior to the hurricane, there was a fire in my house, big enough to cause us to spend a few days in a hotel. We were just recovering from that tragedy when we were blindsided by the hurricane. Over a foot of water was in my house. Not just rain water, not shower water..no..couldn't be that easy. It was dirty, stinking sewage water and salt water from an ocean surge never before seen by the Northeast. The "100 year storm" they're saying - one that only gets seen once every 100 years.  I was on the Titanic..you know the scene where the water is coming into the ship from everywhere? Electrical outlets busting with water? Doors collapsing under the pressure of the sea? That was me.

The cleanup is still in progress, and will last for a number of months. Some of our possessions, furniture, appliances have been destroyed, but we are able to live in the bedrooms of our house on the upper floors and avoid the destroyed areas.  But, we were without power, heat and electric for over 15 days. 15 days of candlelight, flashlights..and battery operated radios.  Yes, there were many fun family times, playing games by candlelight, or dinners out as a respite, but there were also many times frustrated in line waiting for gas for 2 or more hours to fill a generator that provided us with one working refrigerator and not much else, sleeping in coats and hats because it was below 40 degrees in our house and wondering what we would eat for days at a time.  There were stories of shootings, looting and robberies.  Our street, our whole neighborhood, hell, our entire shoreline, was in total, pitch black darkness at night.  Some moved out of town..others, like myself and my family, stuck it out with little place to go and fear of leaving and not having the gas to return or returning to find our home further destroyed.

It makes me wonder: this was a category 1 hurricane.  What would a category 2 be? 3? A nuclear bomb set off in the metropolitan area? What would the gas lines be then? How calm would the people be waiting on line for food and necessities of life? 

But, I don't want to be too dramatic..there are many people..far too many people in worse shape than me. Some lost their entire home. Some still are without heat or hot water. Those are the people I still hurt for...

Yes, I'm here..but am I back? I still don't know for sure.

Tittie Tuesday: Sex on the Beach

The name of a drink, right? Right. Well, not always. So, here's my story about sex (almost) on the beach.

I was with a friend of mine. This is in college, and we used to go to the beach, about a 30 minute drive, and all the girls would go topless, and it was fun. Well, they finally officially made the beach a "clothing optional" beach. So, then when we went, we'd see a naked body or two occasionally. Well, one day, as we're laying topless, we're kinda watching these two guys. One of them is peeling off a wet suit, after having just come out of the surf with his board. And let me tell you, this boy was fire! He had kinda long dirty blonde hair, he was super tan, and had no tan lines. And his body was to die for! I had to hold myself back from drooling. His friend was no slouch, either, but not as tan, not as built, but still very cute.

My friend and I looked at each other, and both had the same thought - we gotta get them to come over!!! So, we started shouting "Hey! You guys want some beer?" That got their attention right away, and probably the fact that we were topless helped, too! Surfer dude pulled on some board shorts, and they headed over to us. We decided to pop on our tops so we wouldn't feel weird. We offered them beers, and they sat down with us. I was totally hot for surfer dude, and sadly, so was my friend. I hate it when that happens. So, we chatted about crap, school, etc. Surfer dude and I were really hitting it off. Then I saw my friend and the other guy get up, and they said they were going for a walk. That was fine. So, surfer dude and I walked up to the water, and kinda played in the water a bit. The surf knocked me down a couple times, so I had to go out deeper so I could pull my bottoms down, and get the sand out. He thought this was pretty funny, and kept trying to get me to just take them off completely. We finally walked back up, and sat down near some very large rocks, in a sort of secluded spot. We stopped talking and started kissing, and I let him take my top off. He told me I had the best tits he had ever seen. Really? Ok, who am I to argue?

So, we fooled around, but I stopped him when he went for my bottoms. He didn't have a condom, and I didn't even know his last name. I wanted to have sex with him, I just couldn't let myself do it without protection. He said it was ok, but I could tell he was disappointed. Yea, aren't they all. So, we decided to get up, and go walking to find our friends. We walked over some boulders, and nearly fell on them! They were having sex, right on the beach, right there, out in the open for whoever wanted to see! "Wow! Sorry!", we both kinda stumbled, and went back the other way. We laid back down on our blanket, and after a little bit, here they came. We chatted some more, and then we decided to go.

They both wanted to go out that night, and so we picked a restaurant to meet at, and then we packed up and started walking back to the cars. The two of them were ahead of us, and surfer dude said, "It was really fun meeting you. I had a great time. I wish I could see you again," "What do you mean?" I said. "We'll see you guys at the restaurant." "Maybe", he said. "Problem is, we both like you, so it's a little awkward now that he's pegged your friend."
 

I was a little bit stunned by this. We said good bye, see ya later, type stuff, a few more kisses, and we were back on the road. My friend was very excited, and couldn't decide what to wear for that night. I sat there, not saying anything. She went on and on about how great the guy was, and yea, she couldn't believe she let him fuck her, but it felt right, and they were probably going to be seeing each other now, and blah, blah, blah. I just sat there.
 

So, she picked me up later on that night, we were looking hot, and we drove over to where we were meeting. We waited. And waited. I knew they weren't going to show up. It was awful. My friend looked like she was going to cry. I couldn't tell her it was her own fault - that he got what he wanted, and so why spend money?

 

We ended up going to dinner, and then she drove me home. Several times she would say, "I just can't figure out what happened?" and "I thought they liked us."
 

I just said, "Well, those guys were jerks, and they don't know what they're missing." I never told her what surfer guy said. I kinda wished I had given him my number, though!

In the Beginning...

Where to begin? Jesus...I'm tired..fucking exhausted.

I had never, ever imagined generous people holding rallies, donating clothes, food, supplies..the Red Cross making rounds in my neighborhood..all for the tragedies that have befallen us.

At the time this post is written, it's been 15 days since Hurricane Sandy made an unwelcome visit to my area. Rain, wind and more damaging tidal surges caused us to be without power, heat, hot water for 15 days.  A subsequent nor'easter borough frigid weather and snow to our area at an inopportune time.

Sewage water and salt water accumulated in the lower level of my house, which was my Great Room which included all the comforts that you can imagine - all ruined. Thank god the approaching water stopped at the front door of my house..and never caused any further damage.  But, a fire caused additional damage. 

I know I'm not alone..there are people out there without houses, who have died..who have suffered more than me and my family. But I also know that everything I worked for, everything I did to make my house a "home" has to be constructed again. We are not displaced, but, we are relying on the help of others - for hot meals, showers, and Internet access. I feel we are a burden.

I never thought someone would be driving in my street..offering me a hot meal. I turned it away..there are still people worse off than me.

Cold and Tired

It's been a crazy two weeks..and I have lots to tell you. None of it very good..but I am surviving and so is my famnily thankfully.

The Hurricane hit us hard..

but I shall return!

Drowning

Tittie Tuesday: Blow Me Away

Wow. My bud, Explorer Jack, had a question for me. He wanted to know if I like giving blow jobs.

Ok, so that is a really great question! Do I like giving blow jobs? You bet! :D I know I have an audience of experts, so you guys most likely know way more about it than I do. Plus, you are sporting the equipment, and I'm not. But let me just say that I love the feel of a slick cock in my mouth. I love playing around, and when a dude pulses his cock in my mouth, oooooh, I love that! I love to swirl my tongue on the underside of the knob, and flick my tongue in that slit. I like to lick the shaft from the base all the way to the tip. I will admit that I do use my hand a lot at the base. I like it to be not too huge. I have kind of a quick gag reflex, and if the cock is too big, um, then I end up going for more of the head, and using more hand.

 

I am one who likes to lick all around the area, as well. I love to tongue the balls, if they are smooth, and also kiss and lick the thigh area next to the cock, and I love to lick the taint. That's the area between the balls and hole, right? It's where the "seam" is. I like to tickle that seam!

 

Ok, now the next question is obvious - do I swallow? I almost hate to say this, but no, I don't. I had a bad experience the very first time I blew a guy. Short story is that he fucked my face hard and fast, and blew his load in my mouth with no warning, and I was totally unprepared for it. Since then, I have learned that communication is key. You gotta tell me before you blow, so I can pull off, and finish with my hand. I do want to work on this. It's also a texture thing for me, cum is. I need to figure out a way to wean my way onto it. If anyone has any ideas on this, please let me know!

 

If you are married, and your wife doesn't want to give you bjs, chances are that she doesn't want you to blow in her mouth. Just do her the favor, and pull out. If she's not afraid of you giving her that surprise, she will probably be more willing to do it. I love the feel of a hard slippery cock in my mouth, just not the squirt. I'm willing to work on that, though!

 

You know what I love? Giving the blow job up to a point, then having amazing sex! Whew!

Eye of the Storm

As you can imagine..it's been an extremely rough week. I will be back....keep checking in...

Kickin' My Ass

I went to that class. Was held in a nice studio. When I got there, the prior class was using the studio and we had a few minute wait. From the looks of it, our class was going to be very small - turns out it was only 6 guys. It also looked like there wasn't going to be anybody in the class that I would be interested in either.which was kind of a disappointment. Most of the 6 were probably in their late 30's..but just based on shear initial attractiveness, I knew there would be no hook-ups.

Soon, the instructor arrived..although at first I thought he could have been another student. He was youngish - probably late 20's early 30's. Great looks, lean, nice hair..great smile. He walked up to the group waiting, and spoke with the class organizer. He then said hello to the 6 of us, and, of course, I could be imagining things - but, there was some nice eye connection when he said hello to me.

When we entered the studio, we all got our mats. "I'm going to work you guys hard" he said. I was in the front row of 3 rows of 2 guys each. He ended up rearranging my mat in order to allow better spacing - pulling my mat almost in line with his. Maybe this guy was interested?

He told us he was an instructor to many dancers, even was the "trainers  - trainer" teaching many of the people who work at the areas most exclusive clubs.

He began the nearly 1 1/2 hour session with a quick but brisk warm up. I've done lots of working out - playing ball, spin classes. I would never consider myself out of shape. I would even classify myself as arrogant when it comes to any class - like "this class won't be too much for me!" That, apparently, would change. In this class there were no weights involved - lots of yoga poses, combined with crazy unbalanced movements. In a matter of 5 minutes I was dripping sweat. We stretch forward, doing "planks" lifting one arm, raising a leg, pulling in and out with the arm and leg, switching arms/legs, balancing with one leg in front of another, raising my arms overhead, stepping side to side, then again..5 times.."8 more!" the hot instructor would tell us, then, when you thought you couldn't hold your arms up anymore, he'd say again: "8 more!"

Then there was the squats..the positioning burned your calves..your thighs were also on fire. Some of the moves were "dancer-like" requiring balance and flexibility as well as coordination that I just don't have. Often, I'd be falling over on the pose. All the while, he'd encourage me.

Being in front I had little view of what was going on behind me. Lots of times, I just couldn't hold the plank, or lift my arms..my shirt was drenched, my mat was now dotted with drops of sweat. My mouth felt like I had swallowed a mouthful of ocean water it was so salty. Sweat poured off me. Still, I worked on.

Finally, it looked like things were winding down in the class. We were matched up with a partner (Damn! I wanted the instructor!) and helped each other bend, stretch and flex. Of course the instructor could do splits, bend to touch the floor and beyond.

When done, I went over to the instructor and thanked him for his time. "You worked hard. he said. "You should be proud of yourself."

The next day, I checked out his name online, Facebook, etc. Apparently, this guy is 29 years old, and is quite the accomplished actor. He was in  soap operas, Broadway plays, TV and film roles. I emailed him that day to thanking him for his encouragement and kicking my ass!

Why I want to Live (V)

A Workout

I've joined lots of "groups" online and receive lots of emails from many sources. Massage groups, sex groups, advertisers, etc.

There's one group that I've always been intrigued to see in person but because of where and when the meetings are held, I never had a chance to go.  Some of their meetings are group massages and they also hod assorted workshops. I get an email saying they are having a conditioning class.  The class will focus on flexibility, endurance, muscle building and fat loss. It will be taught by trainers from the areas top gyms. It includes a short massage session to release sore muscle at the end of the class.

The studio is in the city and there's a small charge to attend. The classes are given once a week for 4 consecutive weeks.

Feeling like this class could be interesting, both on a fitness and sexual level, I respond that I will attend. I'll let you know how I get to work up that sweat!