Yes, We're Gay But..

I saw this video..it takes a little while to see the whole thing and figure out where it's headed.
I guess it's to show  that there is so much more about someone than their sexuality.  Or was it to question stereotypes...that a gay person can be into football, yet be gay, or be into knitting or fashion and be gay? ;)

In any case...I'm BILIKEME...and I'm BI.

Any comments?

Male bag

Another satisfied reader:

Hi, just found your blog.

I am a married guy, in my forties from the UK south of London. I have a couple of kids and lovely wife. Although I had a relationship with a guy before getting married I did not continue with him. When I tried to contact him after a few years he had been killed in an accident, he was a lovely genuine guy and although we had good times together I did not try to meet anyone else. Ironically I have had lots of women trying it on with me but, as I am very straight looking and acting men do not consider me available! I have a good friend at the gym who I work out with 3/4 times a week, we are close and I fancy the pants off him [literally!] but he either doesnt want to get involved or is straight and I dont want to push it. There must be so many guys in my/our position who would love to have a good friend to talk to, meet and become intimate. I remember so well the first time I unbuttoned Peters shirt and felt his chest. I am 6' 4' with a good body and a genuinly good looking guy - no good for you - some chest hair! Its good to hear that not every guy wants to just have full sex but explore each others body, and from your photo on the blog I would think thats exactly what any guy would do with you. How do I meet a guy that I want to become close to and share mutual pleasure?

Will become a regular on the blog!

I'm happy you've found something here that you find interesting.  That's what keeps me writing. And although I certainly love the smoothness of some men's chest, please do not think that there aren't hairy chests that I find attractive!  

How do you find a that perfect guy?  As soon as I find out, I will let you, and my blog readers know..

Hump Day

Hate Mail

I get a smattering of hate mail on occasion.  Nobody is ever bold enough to actually leave his email, they're all anonymous comments.  I moderate my comments to filter out spammers, and delete these mean, unnecessary messages.
However, there are comments that I do post even if they are contrary to my opinion though.  I don't consider those hate mail. People are allowed to have their own opinions about my life, or about this blog, or sexuality and how I approach it.  For instance, I posted one comment that said recently "This bi thing again? Dude, stop deluding yourself that you are bi. You are gay. The sooner you accept that the better for you."  While I don't agree with this person, they certainly have a right to their opinion, and as long as they say it with some sort of civility, I have no problem posting opposing views.

I got one comment recently that said, basically, "again about you?" and going on about how I was scum for living the life that I do.  It's funny, people come to my blog, called BI LIKE ME and is described as "The life and times of a masculine, closeted, bisexual man." and wonder why it's all about me? Hmm, are you the same person who reads biography's like The Diary of Anne Frank and comment "again with this Jewish girls issues?" or Sarah Palin's book, Going Rogue and be upset it contains political comments and analysis (albeit completely idiotic and wrong) or be upset by her conservative views, seemingly idiotic statements or her complete inability to grasp the simple concept of geography?

Earlier this week someone commented on my Open Letter to Tiger Woods that I have no clue about addiction.  While I have never said I am any expert in addiction (or anything else for that matter) I think  I am certainly allowed to comment on my views about Tiger Woods.  In addition, I think a lot of that posting was made tongue in cheek.

To these people that send these inane or rude comments I ask: Why do you actually read my blog?  Are you expecting a photographic journal of the America's? or today's Sport headlines and analysis?  How about a recitation of the social and economic impact of globalization?  Somehow, I think even if I did attempt to highlight those issues or discuss any of those topics, you wouldn't be my target audience, since you are unable to grasp the simple idea that this is a blog about me and my life, and my opinions.
Listen, I'm more than happy to put myself out there and have people read about it.  For me it's therapeutic.  I never started this blog with the idea that I would be reaching massive audiences.  The fact that my blog seems to have attracted some people is satisfying.  I hope some people enjoy reading and maybe it helps one or two.  But, I don't force anyone to read, nor could I.

Lets make a deal, you don't have to come to read my written works on my blog, and I won't come to your work, and kick the slurpee machine.  Deal?

An Open Letter to Tiger Woods

Dear Tiger:

I know you're probably going through a rough (excuse the golf pun) time right now, but I hope you will come out of it with flying colors.

As many of you may have heard, in the days since Woods wrecked his car early on the morning of Nov. 27 outside his Florida home, sparking rumors of marital problems and a flood of allegations of marital infidelities, tabloids have claimed the golfer engaged in affairs with at least 11 women.

Recently, you checked into a sex rehab center in Mississippi. Pine Grove Behavioral Health & Addiction Services.  This center advertises itself as "one of the nation's most comprehensive treatment campuses." Pine Grove's "Gentle Path" program caters to sex addicts and involves two parts. First, patients undergo a Comprehensive Diagnostic Assessment, which typically lasts one to two days. The Residential Treatment Program lasts an average of six weeks. The treatment includes group therapy, shame reduction work and experiential trauma work.

I support you in your attempts to correct your actions and save your image, but in actuality, do you believe this rehab will work?  Let me explain.

Do you think you are in fact a sex addict? Because, I know that being one of the richest sports stars in the world has its benefits, and one of those benefits is access to anything you want and the power to get those things.  Of course, those items could be monetary, like watches, cars, planes, even expensive suites in hotels, houses..just look at cribs!

But, of course this power to buy also bring with it the power to own and the ability to attract.  People want you..whether it is Gillette, Wheaties, Tag Heuer or another person (girls, guys). You are in demand and always will be.  There is only one way around this...give up what attracts people (the money).  Therefore, I will, out of the goodness of my heart,. and the desire to help you rectify your tarnished image, allow myself to be burdened by your wealth.  Just get in touch (an email will do).

Do you think you will be able to avoid the addiction that you are being treated for?  I mean, this isn't smoking, its not pot, its not even heroine.  This is SEX, it's the ultimate drug.  Sex is an integral part of our makeup, after all, Adam and Eve were placed on this earth to live and populate it.  Sex was a major part of their, and thus, our being, it is part of our chromosomal makeup.  How are we to avoid this?  Do you think some group therapy will prevent our desires?  Do you think scrubbing toilets for a few weeks helps?  There is no salve, there is no solution, there is no bright light that you will see. 

I speak from experience Tiger, there is no avoiding the desire for sexual interaction.   Sex is indeed the impossible addiction to break..harder than crack (please, I'm talking about the drug), harder than heroine.  Babies (unless they are crack babies) are not predisposed to want crack or heroine, but we are all predisposed to desire sex.  Yea, we may be able to prevent it for a week, maybe two..but you know that after a month, if some girl comes into the clubhouse and bends over, your putter will be reading for a swing.  You cant change nature.

It may not be socially acceptable or image profitable to admit your desires.  You know, and I know, this "Rehab" is a ruse.  In a few months, you'll be back at your usual routines, the hangouts, the internet sites.  It fuels the fire within us.  We are powerless over it.

I know from what I speak.

Good luck,
BLM

Haitian Relief

https://www.hopeforhaitinow.org/Default.asp

Oy Vey My Son Is Gay!

This looks like a funny movie coming out...

Male Bag

I like to post email I receive because I think it helps to see that "we" are not alone:
so..some more mail:

    I read some of your blog and I really understand a lot of where you're at. I'm not married, so my situation is not as complicated as yours, but that only makes me more sympathetic towards your situation. I too wrestle with conflicting feelings. I feel like It would be easier if I could feel all gay or all straight. But as long as I can remember I have been sexually attracted to both men and women. Occasionally I look at hardcore sights; those just leave me feeling hollow as do my impressions of casual sex. I've dated some really beautiful girls, and am close friends with some pretty hot guys. I just don't feel right getting too deep with anyone with this huge grey area. That just wouldn't seem fair. I became sexually active at a young age, (with both guys and girls) so early in high school I swore off sex till I could get things figured out. I'm only 23, so I figure I'll have time for sex later. 

     I know what I want out of life, and that doesn't include a boyfriend or fuck buddy. So I have decided to leave sex out of the picture and try to sort through as much other stuff in my life as I can. The hope is that in the end it will work itself out. We'll see what happens. For now I'm just trying to make my life as uncomplicated as possible. Still, here is so much pressure to choose, part of me wishes there was more of a place in our society for the Bi individual, but with the way I was raised, I know I will never be satisfied with ambiguity. How does one embrace indecision and fickleness?

Blessings and Regards.

- T

Embrace?  I don't know how to embrace indecisiveness...I only try and tolerate it.  The indecision and conflict I feel sometimes gets the best of me.  It's a daily fight..a constant companion, and an inner torment.

Good luck!

Quick Shout Out and a Thank You!

A fellow blogger helped me out this morning on the annoying pop-up that suddenly appeared on my blog.

His blog, as you all probably know, is one of the hottest out there...

Go check it out..my way of saying that you to him..and once you see the pics on his blog..you'll be thanking me!

Artistry of Male 

Hump Day

Help!

I see there is a pop-up on this blog saying:

A username and password are being requested by http://www.wastedblogs.com. The site says: "hotlinking sensualwriter.com/favicon.ico is forbidden, please notify the webmaster of this blog about this problem he should remove the hotlink."


I have no idea what this is, and I cannot see where this website is on my blog.  Somehow, I think I've been duped..and dont know how to get rid of it.  Any help would be appreicated!

TV Views

I love reality TV.  It's amazing where they find such complex and crazy people!

Take a look at American Idol, one of my favorites.  The first few weeks, where thousands of people fill stadiums in each city they visit, to audition is the funniest part of the show.  Some of these people are obviously very talented.  I mean, you don't have to be Simon to realize when talent is there.  But, others?  God, some of them are just plain crazy!

These people come in with their hopes up, and it seems, really, truly believing they are amazing singers.  But, one note out of their mouth and you know it's going to be a car wreck.  Some people couldn't even talk, much less sing.  It's so funny, but it has to be embarrassing too.  A singer walking in to see Simon, Randy and Kara, must be nervous, but it doesn't explain why some cause blood to drip out of my ears.  I assume to some, its a goof: they're probably looking to get on TV, see if they can make it past the initial review and say they saw the stars.  But, others, leave in tears, obviously upset that they aren't the Next American Idol.  These people are plain nuts.

I see other shows, like The Bachelor.  The girls are all sharing, fighting over and kissing the same man (hot man, I might add) and none find it odd. Some girls, after meeting the Bachelor the first night feel "a connection" or are already in love.  Are they kidding me?
Look at Survivor or Real World or even the new reality spoof, Jersey Shore.  They all feature hot guys (and girls too) and show lots of skin.  But they also feature some of the craziest, alcoholic and socially inept people on the earth.  Please, are we seriously interested in homeland security?  Start with some of the reality show contestants, and lock them up! They are dangerous!


Despite the people that are on reality shows these days, or maybe because of the people on these shows, I keep coming back for more.  They are what attract me, and others, to these shows.  After all, in my fucked up world, I can flip on the TV, and find someone in worse shape than me.  Thank god!

Love the One Your With

My tastes in men certainly have changed over the years. At one point, I'd make out with anyone, well almost anyone. It was my "experimenting" phase, so a cock was a cock.  I didn't have a whole lot of standards.  Although that phase rears its ugly head every once in a while, usually when I'm so horned that the cum clouds my thinking,  But I am usually pretty picky about who I'm with sexually.

When I met Lance, who was my first real boyfriend and became fond of him, I enjoyed not only his quiet personality, but also loved his small and smooth body.  He probably was 4 or 5 inches shorter than me, and I really learned to appreciate his body. I loved towering over him when we hugged and kissed.  He was very smooth, and had a smooth tight ass (which I learned to appreciate). 

Ross, on the other hand, was tall...as tall as me as a matter of fact.  I was shocked that I was into him, and I told him often how, although he was incredibly hot, that he "wasn't my type" (God, how I was wrong!).  Also, Ross had a smooth chest for the most part, but had a nice hairy ass!  A hairy ass??? Jeez! What was happening to me!

Now that Ross and I aren't together anymore, I still would love to find someone with a body like him.  Tall, smooth..well..I do prefer a smooth ass, but, hair is OK there too.  Would I refuse to date a guy who had a body like Lance? Of course not! Fuggetabouddit!

But, it seems like if I do end up finding someone, ultimately someone who I connect with personality-wise and then I will learn to love their body.  Of course there has to be some attraction to them in a physical sense.  But, I'm apt to overlook a hairy ass if I like the person I'm with.  Would I overlook a hairy chest? hmm..tough question..I don't really know.  How about an uncut cock? Nah, I probably would pass on that one (sorry all you uncut guys-please keep your comments!). 

I guess the moral of this story is that I end up appreciating, and loving the one I'm with. Maybe the packaging isn't as you normally  expect or desire, if the insides are great, you're liable to overlook some minor "imperfections."

Marketing 101

I get lots of emails and comments asking "how do you pickup guys?" "how come your so successful?" or asking for advice on posting ads online or where to look for guys.  It's funny, because I don't consider myself any expert on gay or bi dating.  I guess I'm just out there..active to some extent.  But, I don't have any huge secrets.

I suppose the important thing to say is you can't lie when you sell something.  How would you feel if an advertisement said something was the best thing since sliced bread, and when you got it, it was horrible?  Well, I suppose you'd return the item, right?.  Well, the same thing applies in online dating and ads. You can't say you're in shape, and young looking if you're not.  Eventually, someone is going to see a picture or meet you and realize that you've lied.  I know, believe me, because I've met my share of guys who have lied in their profiles and after a few pleasantries, I'm outta there.  You could say that well, "just because someone doesn't look good doesn't mean they're not nice" but, I think it's a more important sign of their personality and trustworthiness as a person.  If you're willing to lie to me about your looks or stats, well, where does it end?  It's a personality flaw.

There are guys out there, of course, that just are on line to get pics of other people for their own use or for jerk off material.  They have no intention of meeting anyone or chatting.  They've used other people's pics as their own and have bad intentions from the beginning.  These people are basically scum of the earth.  I assume they also look like it too.  They have no chance of meeting anyone, and I mean no chance whatsoever.  They probably are one of these bed-bound or house-bound people, too obese, ugly or diseased to be exposed to society.  These people cannot abide by truth-in-advertising because they wouldn't even get a bite in a food starved piranha filled fish tank.

But, everyone else, those of us that work every day, have some sort of personality, are law abiding citizens and can make some conversation have something to offer, even if you're not America's Next Top Model.  So, all I can say is, put it into words.  Are you just looking for quick sex?  Say it! A relationship? No problem.  Are you out of shape? There are those that will accept you for who you are.  Just be honest.

I went through the phase of lying about my age, or hiding the fact that I'm married. I've decided that if I am looking for a relationship, I have to be completely up front about it.  The person has to be completely aware of my situation, my circumstances and my life if it is going to work.  If, after I've disclosed myself, the person is not interested, well, what future did we have anyway? None.

What's my ad like?  Well, I'm not going to tell you, in order to remain anonymous.  But, suffice it to say that it is similar to my blog...I'm honest about what I'm looking for, I'm truthful about my looks and I don't expect many responses, because most guys online aren't looking for what I'm looking for, and it takes a special person to be able to deal with a bi, closeted, married guy.

How am I successful with guys?  I don't know.  I guess my blog seems like I am successful, but I don't know if you can consider myself successful in guy relationships. I have had a few long lasting boyfriends and I guess I would consider Ross a very successful one.  But that only worked because he was aware of my situation and accepting of it.

I was talking to my masseur the other night.  He was complaining about the gay scene.  He goes to many gay clubs, looks online and sees all the same people, all looking for quick hookups.  He says its impossible to find a boyfriend.  I agree, but I think the straight people complain about that too.  Whether you're online or in a club, finding a mate is very tough.  But, as a gay guy, or a bi guy, I suppose it could be tougher.  First of all, if 10% of the population is gay, then you're fishing pool of people is a lot smaller.  Second, we all know what guys want.  It's the same problem girls have and complain about..all guys want is sex.  Guys just aren't interested in relationships.  Now think how a non-straight guy, who is looking for a relationship would feel: since most guys are looking for sex, there are no guys into a long lasting thing.  It definitely makes things tougher.

If you're looking for something serious, be yourself, and be honest.  Because if by chance, you find that special someone who is looking for the same thing you are, and you show up and you're nothing like you've advertised, you've started on the wrong foot.

Male Bag

From a recent reader:
***
I discovered you blog just yesterday.   After following a link to a recent post I ended up reading the enitre history from start to finish. 

My story is somewhat the same .  Married 19 years.  Two boys, 9 and 14.  Always interested in guys, but didn't have a encounter until after I was married a few years.  Another married guy - and that situation, while good learning experience, turned sour for many reasons (all I can say is never screwaround with a (psycho) co-worker).

Tomorrow I hope to see my "Ross".  Johhn and I dated from 2003-early-2008.  Pretty hot at times.  He's 15 years youner - I'm 48.  Sometimes several times a week, sometimes less.  But I think I fell in love.  Then he grew distant.  Stopped being available, so I turned to the internet.  Skipping a bit of history about bad encounters with unfulfiulling skanks and what not - like you I cannot turn off my attraction to guys - he reappaeared last month.  The hook-up was hot, familair and comfortable.  We spent the majority of the time talking and cuddling.  Then no contact for weeks.  Tonight he texts and asks to get together tomorrow.  I couldn't say no. 

I've made my excuses to be out of the house.  And can't wait for the date.

Anyhow, thanks for your writing.  Your openess to blog and put in writing many of the emotions that echo what I feel and yearn for has been helpful.

Good luck as your experience continues.  I'll  continue to follow your blog.

Play safe and keep family first.

Dan
***
Thanks Dan...our stories are similar.  I guess from the comments and emails I receive it a common theme, good or bad.  It's funny how many people have the same experiences yet, we don't know each other.  Maybe a Fraternity of Bi Brothers is in order...

Phi Kappa Bi?

Hump Day

Mum's the Word

I was thinking about Frenchy this week, and how I wanted to know more about him.  I IMed him online and asked if he had a few minutes to talk.  He agreed and I peppered him with questions.

What's he into, what's he like, what does he do, bi, gay, etc...all the usual.  I also told him my short story, a little about my ex boyfriend, and what I was looking for.  I was hopeful that he was looking for the same thing.  Apparently, he isn't.  But, he is not dismissing me.  No, he is interested in having someone to hang with on occasion, just doesn't want to be involved with someone who is married, which is completely understandable.  I think for this type of relationship to work, it would have to be disclosed, and agreed to.  Also, it probably works best with another bi or closeted guy because a gay guy is going to want, and really deserves someone who can give themselves to him completely, which I obviously can't.

But, that's not what bothered me...what bothers me is the complete disregard to any interest by most non-straight guys.  Frenchy is completely fine meeting me, not knowing much about me.  I asked "any questions for me?" and he paused while he thought of one (which I had just asked him: are you completely clean, safe, tested?)  So, basically, he's fine with the sex, but not interested in the person behind the body.  And, I'm fine with that type of relationship too...to some extent.  Yea, I need someone to get off with every once in a while and him being hot, close to me and willing definitely is a plus.


But, why isn't anyone interested in something more?  Look online..here's a recent listing of some headlines on CraigsList:

Bi Married for NSA;
just shaved...now i need to b sucked;
stretch my ass open with your thick cock;
Horny tight bottom looking;
Just Want to Suck Some Cock

Now, does this look like a list of ads for a mutually engaging relationship?  Do you think you're going to end up in a conversation with anyone here? It's not exactly "harmony.com". It's all about sex.  Nobody wants to talk, nobody wants to get to know someone, develop something long lasting.  It's slam, bam, thank you man!.

Every gay guy complains that "there are no good guys out there" or "all the good guys are taken/straight, etc." but I don't see anyone looking for anything more than sex.  Yea, we as guys love sex, crave it, need it, but beyond the sex, don't you want something more? I know I do!

The non-straight community publicly is all about full disclosure. Everyone wants you to be upfront about your status (HIV etc.) and have safe sex, but when you look on some sites, you have to dig deep to find the status of a person.  Shouldn't THAT be on the front of the profile?  Do you want to chat with someone without knowledge of this HIV status or sexual past?  Is it more important to know if they are a top or bottom, or blue eyed or green, than if they have been tested or not?  If we want to encourage people to be upfront and honest about their HIV status, then that is the stat that should be front and center in a profile, not 2 pages deep.

Page 1: I'm a fun loving guy.  Have green hair, orange eyes. Great fun at parties.  I knit, quilt and do macrame
Page 2: Pic 1: me shirtless, Pic 2: me naked, Pic 3: me hard, Pic 4: me cumming, Pic 5: me with YOU
Page 3: Oh, buy the way, I have every known communicable disease ever invented. Call me!

The gay/bi/transgendered public community encourages full disclosure, demands testing and safe sex.  We see the ads in the magazines, on TV and it's taught in our public schools.  But in reality, behind closed doors, they are still hiding their skeletons in the closet. Everyone says they want to be in a relationship, but nobody is willing to commit the time and energy to one. Everyone agrees that safe sex and disclosure of status is important..but its not practiced.

They say that we want the truth.  But they can't handle the truth!

French Fried

I've been chatting with this guy that I met online for a few weeks, but because of the holidays, etc. it's been kinda hit or miss.  Yesterday, I saw him online again and as it turns out, he lives about 10 minutes from my office.  Very convenient!

Previously, he was abroad, in France for a few weeks, so he's new to the New York online scene.  He's 25 years old, about 6'1", and 170 lbs. He's also a top.  So, on the scale of matching, I'd give him an 8.  His pics are really neither here nor there.  One he looks real good, but the body pic kinda looked bad.  But, I look at self-taken pics with a skeptical eye, since I know it's very hard to take a truly genuinely good pic of yourself.  I've also been told that my pics (taken by Lance, a photographer) don't justify me.  So, go figure.

When I told Frenchy that I worked very close to him, he asked "so when are we gonna hang?"  I said, "how about today?"  He agreed.  We spent the next couple of minutes discussing what we would do together, and basically agreed we'd just jerk off.  He wasn't too revealing about what else he was into other than saying he's a top.

I left work and arrived at his apartment in no time.  I knocked on his door and when he opened it, I was pleasantly surpirsed.  In his black shirt and dark jeans, he looked very slim..a definite plus.  His dark hair and eyebrows were nicely accented by his neatly done 5 o'clock shadow.  I took off my coat, and he followed him to his bedroom 2 feet away as we greeted each other and made small talk.

Two seconds later, he was grabbing at his crotch and I was grabbing mine.  He lifted his shirt to show a nicely proportioned yet thin and defined frame.  A little hairier than I'd prefer on his chest, but definitely hot.  We lowered our pants to reveal our cocks, and laid next to each other on his queens sized bed.  Soon, the shirts and pants came off and we were laying naked next to each other, stroking each other off.

I asked if he was into making out, and he said "sure" and I gave his cute little lips a long kiss.  Nice kisser too...  We continued to jerk off, I complimented him on his hot cock, probably bigger than mine, but I'm ok with that ;).  He likewise said my cock was hot.

As he jerked off, he grabbed my cock as I began unloading a huge gush into his hand.  He then soon blew his load all over his stomach.  We cleaned up, and got dressed, and I quickly left.  I mentioned that we should do this again, and he agreed, saying I was hot.

I hope we do get to meet again.  Frenchy was a cutie.  I would love to have a friend like that, who is close to me, to meet on occasion for some safe, discreet fun.  I'd love to find out more about him..what he's into, looking for. Could I get into more with him?  Yes, but, two tops...don't exactly match.  Although, maybe he can be convinced...we'll see.

The Bachelor

Was flipping channels the other night on the TV.  I eventually stopped on ABC, and the New Bachelor.  I haven't really watched this program since it first came out, but when I saw the build up this new bachelor was getting, I had to watch.

He's 31, a pilot, and ruggedly handsome, drives a motorcycle, so he also comes with a bad boy image.  But this guy, is just no bad boy!  He's super cute, ripped and seems genuinely nice.

They show a scene of him getting ready for his dates.  He's in the shower, and is talking to the camera, while he is washing is washboard abs. I was in love!

Wish he were into guys....You be the judge.

Male Bag

I stumbled upon your blog this morning and I haven't moved from my computer screen since (I started at the beginning). So much for that damn to-do list...
I can't tell if its your style or subject matter, but I don't imagine I'll be moving from this spot until I get caught up. It's amazing how quickly I have become interested in your logic, invested in your relationships (I can't wait to see where you are with Ross), and your sexcapades are fun too.
Just wanted to drop some support, keep the stories coming! Have a great New Years Eve!
All the best from Austin, TX
***
and another:

***
Hi,

I just discovered your blog and wanted to say thank you for sharing your thoughts, worries and stories.  I'll definitely be making regular visits to keep up to date and having worked my way through your 'A New Beginning' post I plan on going back and reading some more of the earlier posts in your archive.
I can sense from your posts that you're very much a family man and are protecting your family by living the life that you are, even if its not a totally honest one.  I say that only because you're hiding a part of who you are from them.  I certainly understand your reasons for doing that, they're why you're tormented by what you do in secret, and I take them to mean that you still care very much for them and don't want to hurt them.  So long as you practice safe sex and don't put your wife or yourself at risk then enjoy yourself and I hope you find someone you appreciates you and understands your situation.

I think that it definitely helps to have someone to talk things through with.  I hope that you have a good friend that you can be open and honest with, whether its in real life or online.  It can help you stay sane.

The world does love to make everyone put labels on themselves.  I don't think that a lot of people understand that relationships have evolved and are a lot more complicated than they ever were.  Being out is not the right choice for everyone, and not everyone understands the attraction to both men and women.
I'm a bi woman in the UK and came out to my family and friends earlier this year and although I'm not currently in a relationship I was kind of forced into coming out by my mum asking me point blank if I was a lesbian, totally unexpected question and I wasn't quite sure how to answer her but did end up telling her I was bi.  Turns out she'd been talking to my sister about her suspicions, I do wonder what caused them though.  My sister hasn't taken it so well, but is still talking to me.  A friend of mine (nearly girlfriend) came out to her family at the same time and had a totally different experience from them.  So much so that our budding relationship hasn't worked out and we've gone back to being friends.

I have a married guy friend that I hook up with occasionally.  Its no strings fun and we both take it as such, we experiment sexually more than I have with anyone else.  I have known him for about 7 years and we have been hooking up for around 2 years now, I have met his wife a couple of times too.  The way I have always viewed it is that if he's OK with it and doesn't suffer guilt then I am too, he's the one that has something to lose, not me.  We chat and text a fair bit since he travels and is away from home regularly.  But we have understood boundaries, and I wouldn't even class myself as 'the other woman' I'm just a friend with benefits.  Obviously not everyone would understand this and I'd be painted in a bad light.  Am I going to stop though?  Probably not.

Thanks again for sharing a little part of your life on your blog and know that not everyone judges you for being who you are inside, even if you can't show it to everyone.

I'll stop rambling now.

Regards
Just
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One more...

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Hello BiLikeMe,

Just wanted to drop you a message saying thanks for your blog.  You writing of your experiences is so helpful to so many.  You give hope, entertainment, and inspiration.  10 years ago when I was single and bi-curious but otherwise completely inexperienced, your blog would have been a life-saver for me.  

I am 39 and started a relationship with another man as a bisexual 3 years ago, and now I think I would probably be characterized as gay, though I don't use this label myself.  My partner and I don't engage in anal sex at all and are more cock focused (it's a beautiful thing).  So I do appreciate your writings.  I should write a blog of my own, but am hesitant to put my entire life out there.  Plus I am not hot like you, I don't have any pics I would post, and certainly don't have the stories to share that you do.  Monogamous sex can be somewhat monotonous (as I am sure you know).  You connecting with hot guys makes for great reading (though I did have to cringe when you mentioned giving Jesse a card for BiLikeMe).  To give someone you hardly know, intimate physical and romantic (through your blog) access seems pretty scary to me.

Anyway, thanks for sharing and for putting your life out for all of us to read.  Be safe and I look forward to your posts in the future.

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Thanks for the compliments everyone!  Glad to hear someone's enjoying my blog...

Hump Day

The Look of Love

You know the look..usually it's the serious face, with the longing stare. Sometimes, it could even be the same stare with a smile, or a smirk.  Love is a look that can be demonstrated in many ways..


The sounds of love are equally varied.  Sometimes, nothing..maybe a grunt, a murmur.  But, sometimes, it's like an all out wrestling match, yells, screams and dirty talk.


They say love is never having to say "I'm sorry" and I don't ever remember love being one where someone should be in pain.  But, as I look at the different blogs and pictures online, that's all I see!  There is NEVER a pic of a guy getting fucked, where he is just, staring, calm, looking happy and longingly at the man that has his dick in his ass.  It's always a blood curdling scream face!  Isn't there supposed to be pleasure in that act?


I've fucked guys before..and I'm gentle..I can only imagine (I guess I couldn't imagine) what it's like to have a cock in your ass.  It could be painful, must take some getting used to..adjusted to and take a while to feel comfortable.  So, why are guys pounding so hard?  Do they like to see the reaction of pain?


I just laugh when I see the pics of gaping mouths, wide eyes, and painful expressions on these guys.  That's not the look of love I want...looks like the look of hate.